Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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