You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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