pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
He felt like a one man threesome
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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