I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
