things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Randomize
