walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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