I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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