just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize