Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
