You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
