i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I smell stomach acid.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
