so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
