So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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