dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
