so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize