Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
