your thong is hanging out like whoa
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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