i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
