..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Randomize
