are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize