Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize