dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
