I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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