and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
