You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
