wrigley field is MILF paradise
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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