either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize