id be glad to
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
and she was petting her beer can
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
