so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
