im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
My bed smells like the plague
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize