This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
