We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
