the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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