She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i will never coherently bang her
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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