I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize