I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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