I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
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