Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
i believe in u and ur pee
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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