I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize