how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
