she woke up with a sticky ear
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
