Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
