Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Drunk is not a location!
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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