You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
i think i just lost a toe
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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