so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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