Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
