apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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