I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize