she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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