you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
